Harry BawBags Blurt

Listen …

I could go on and on telling you about Madeira and its mountains, levadas, people and culture.

But I certainly aint a Rough Guide and I dont look that much like Judith Chalmers!

So lets just say I found it all rather good for my soul and it was just what I needed – it served its purpose.

So lets just have a wee photo show BawBag stylee …

One of the things thats first impressed me while stumbling about all over Funchal was the fact that people grow Bananas in their gardens …

… nice eh? Certainly makes a change fae crabby apples and rhubarb.

The fruit they had over there was AMAZING though! I didnt realise they had about 10 different types of Passion Fruit. I needed to sample them as soon as possible so we went to the fruit market and got absolutely fuckin stiffed by one of the stall holders …

Cost us a bloody fortune … mustve looked at the whiteness of ma body and thought “Tourists!!!”

The Fish Market was just next door so we took a quick look in to see Madeiras famous Scabbard fish. They serve it in all the restaurants out there and I had it a few times – its like a very deep strong Cod flavour – nice … but I reckon you couldnt eat it too often – youd get sick of it … and I mean that literally.

Thats them there … Bloody ugly things with huge eyes and teeth. Apparently they live very deep down and when they are netted and dragged up to the surface their intestines spew out of their arse because of the change in pressure … lovely.

One day we journeyed out to the other side of the island … the trip there was pretty hair raising – imagine the bus at the end of the Italian Job, teetering over the edge of massive cliff … well the opportunity for a re-enactment of that scene seemed to be just around every corner!!!

Anyway we survived it and got a chance to walk around a spooky little town that was tres religious … as this nativity scene demonstrates …

And then I stumbled upon a toy shop with this display …

Mibbe they come alive at night and go on some kinda murderous crusade?

Are kids supposed to PLAY with these???

Anyway …

Another cool thing about Madeira was that there was loads of these wee critters running around everywhere …

Ah desperately wanted tae catch one and put it in a matchbox and smuggle it back tae Blighty.

The missus talked me out of it.

Ho Hum.

While strolling around a supermarket in Funchal I came across this mens grooming product which kinda has an inverse result when translated intae Portuguese …

Magic eh! … It stops ye gettin yer end away.

Now that TICKLED me!

If you wanna see pics of Madeiras scenery there are thousands already on the web.

If you wanna get more of an idea of Madeiras culture check out this blog that I found – its obviously run its course but Ive read it end to end and its brilliant. Its in ma blogroll.

Bravo brave Orlaith … I wonder where she is now?

Im going to round it off with a pic of the missus in the mountains which I will probably have to remove when she finds out I have posted one …

Awrite Doll?

Bawbags 10 – Life 0 … Final Score.

Onwards